Letting Go
by Sabre1
Summary: Duo tells his secret in a very surprising way.


Pairings: 1x2 and mentioned 3x4  
Notes: I think saying that this fic was difficult for me is an understatement. I haven't written Gundam Wing in years. But it was a good sort of difficult because I find myself getting back into these characters. And on that note I cannot tell you if this goes AU or not because it's been so long since I've seen the show. This is another one I wrote while I was at work and I apologize in advance for any grammar mistakes. I really need to find a beta. And don't ask me why my two last fics have involved alcohol. I think my sunbconscious is telling me that it's been far too long since I've been out drinking.  
Spoilers: None  
Warnings: Mentioned boysex!  
Disclaimer: I only wish I owned Duo Maxwell and Heero Yuy.

Duo Maxwell was never very good at keeping secrets. He could never keep them to himself, try as he might. He didn't have to tell everyone. Just as long as one other person knew his secret he was okay. The worst kinds of secrets, for Duo, were the ones that only he knew. The secrets about himself that he wanted to take with him to the grave. Those kinds of secrets ate at him until he told someone or wrote it in his black notebook that he carried around with him at all times.

Duo Maxwell was keeping one of the secrets that he would die before telling anyone. It was the one secret that he could never come clean about or he would risk losing assignments because he had become a liability. He had been taught from day one to never let your emotions get in the way of your work. How could he do that when he had fallen in love with a fellow Gundam pilot?

It had been three months since his last assignment and he was suiting up once again, ready to fight. The familiar adrenaline rush surged through him as he piloted towards his destination. He lived for this. He couldn't wait to get to his target location and begin fighting. He also secretly hoped that He would be there. He hadn't seen Him in over six months and every day his longing grew a little bit stronger.

A grin plastered its way onto Duo's face when he reached his destination. There they were, all four of the other pilots, fighting their enemy together, yet separately. And there He was, in his blue and white and red Gundam. Duo couldn't see Him, but he knew He was inside.

Duo touched down on the grassy bank, drawing out his Gundam's green double bladed scythe. He jumped right into the middle of the fight, reckless as he always was. Duo was not an orderly fighter. He always went in swinging and came out on top, even if it was on top of a gigantic mess. It wasn't long until he heard His voice in his ear.

"Maxwell, watch where you swing that." The voice was quiet and the tone blunt. Duo couldn't help but grin, the voice being sweet music in his ears after all this time.

"No way, Yuy. You just let me do my thing. I'll let you do yours." He was sure Heero and the other pilots could hear the happiness in his voice, but he didn't care. He was high on the adrenaline surging through his body and the fact that Heero was right there, fighting with him.

With the five of them working together, it wasn't long before their mission was accomplished. All of the enemy machines lay in ruins around them. Quatre and Duo yelled in accomplishment, both proud of their work. The other three pilots kept silent, as they usually did. They were always more subdued than the other two.

Duo decided to go out on a limb. "So... anyone up for some drinks?"  
------  
Duo sat in his apartment living room waiting for the other pilots to get there. Surprisingly, they had all agreed to come over and celebrate. He had a decent sized stash of liquor at his apartment, stuff he had picked up along the way. Drinking laws were incredibly lax on a lot of colonies and he had been stocked up for a little while. He wasn't really sure what was going to happen, but the image of Heero Yuy in his bed would not leave his mind.

He jumped slightly when a knock came from the door, breaking his free flowing train of thought. He walked over to the door and opened it to find all of the pilots standing there. He smiled, motioning them all in. Duo walked over to his stereo and put on some music.

It was awkward at first. No one really knew how to act around the other since none of them had actually ever been around each other in non combat situations. Duo talked enough for the five of them and it wasn't long before Duo, Quatre, Trowa, and Heero were all engaged in conversation. Wufei, as usual, was the most quiet, only allowing himself an outburst every once in a while.

Duo went into the kitchen and brought out a bottle of brown liquor. He poured five drinks and handed one to each of the other pilots. They all took a cup, thanking him. Quatre made no attempt to drink any of the contents, not surprising to Duo. The other three had obviously indulged themselves with alcohol before because they drank with no problem. Quatre must have begun to feel left out because it wasn't long before he was emptying his cup as well, a healthy glow showing on his face.

The hours went by and Duo was surprised at how much all of the pilots were letting themselves go around each other. Not only drinking, but laughing and joking as well. He was so used to them being incredibly guarded around one another and the laughter and smiles were almost therapeutic to the young man who was so used to violence and death.

Duo glanced lazily over at the clock. It was now one in the morning and he could feel himself beginning to fall asleep. Quatre and Trowa were draped over opposite ends of the couch, their legs intertwined. Duo would have normally thought that such a display of comfort and affection between the two was strange, but his mind was too far gone to process the thought. Wufei had also fallen asleep on Duo's armchair, though you wouldn't know just by looking at him. He was sitting straight up, his arms crossed across his chest. And Heero... Well, Heero was nowhere to be found. Duo assumed he was in the bathroom and put the thought out of his mind. He may not have gotten what he really wanted, but at least he had some fun that night.

He stumbled into his dark bedroom, not bothering to remove his clothing or shoes. Duo fell into bed, lying on his back and closing his eyes so sleep and alcohol could overtake him.

Duo had no idea how much time had passed when he heard the stumble and curse. He opened his eyes, being greeted only by darkness. He could hear someone in his bedroom and suddenly there was a body on top of his.

It took him a minute to process what was going on. He could hear the figure on top of him muttering and Duo froze in place. Even though he was drunk, he knew that voice as soon as he heard it.

"Sorry..." However, Heero made no move to get off of duo. "I accidentally tripped..."

Then there were hands and groping and lips and tongues and heat and sweating and groaning and grunting and clothing was coming off and panting and oh god that feels good do it again harder faster please more again now oh god oh god Heero...  
------  
Duo woke the next morning, looking around in confusion. The previous night was extremely blurry and his head was throbbing. He looked over at the side of his bed. Empty, as he expected it to be. But the pillow and sheets were warm, as though someone had been lying there only a few moments earlier.

Suddenly, last night came back to Duo like a tidal wave. He groaned and rolled over, the desire to stay in bed and never come out overtaking him. What had he been thinking? Drinking with Heero Yuy? He should have known himself better than to think he could trust himself in that kind of a situation.

Noise from the bathroom told him someone else was awake and showering. Duo sighed, hoping that whoever was in there was the last to leave and he wouldn't have to face anyone. He was in no mood to be social.

He went into his kitchen, pouring himself a cup of coffee. The living room was blissfully empty and the coffee was helping the pounding headache which had been forming since he had opened his eyes.

Duo heard the water shut off and a few moments later Heero emerged from the bathroom, his hair dripping wet. Duo did his very best to ignore the fact that Heero's green tank top was clinging to his wet skin or how Heero's black shorts showed off his assets so well. Duo stared at his coffee, not wanting to be obvious.

"Are you leaving?" Duo cringed internally, he didn't want to sound like he was just throwing him out and it seemed to Duo that he had done just that.

Heero nodded his head slowly, going over to the kitchen and helping himself to a coffee mug and the rest of the coffee. "I have to get back home."

The silence hung thick between them. Duo could think of a million things to say but they all sounded equally as lame. He watched Heero put his empty mug in the sink and walk over towards the door.

"Heero, wait." Heero stopped and turned to look at Duo, his hand on the doorknob. "Listen, about last night..."

"There isn't anything to say, Maxwell." He kept his eyes locked on Duo's and even from across the room Duo felt as though he were looking into him.

Duo smiled awkwardly. "Yeah, I guess not." He walked over to where Heero was, his long braid trailing behind him. He decided once again to go out on a limb and just see what happened. "If you ever want to get together again and hang out... or whatever... you know where I live."

Heero nodded again, and Duo could see the trace of a smile on the usually stoic boys face as he walked out into the morning sunshine.


End file.
